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Why is it so hard to accept ourselves for who we are?

Why is it so hard to accept ourselves for who we are?

Why is it so hard to accept ourselves as we are? To accept oneself means to like yourself, and see yourself as you are…not wishing you were taller, skinnier, prettier, smarter, etc. When you truly accept yourself, you see that you have many good qualities, and you stop giving yourself such a hard time about your ‘bad’ qualities.

Interestingly, with our friends – the ones we really love – we don’t say I like “this” about you, but I wish you were skinnier or prettier or smarter. We just accept them as they are.

So…if everything is there in our lives for a reason, including this “thing” about yourself that you are having trouble accepting, what if today, you look at this “piece of yourself” and see it in your life as a reason to help you accept yourself.

In other words, if you are troubled about your weight, the extra weight you carry could be the way you show yourself a physical reminder of your need for self-acceptance. Every time you see the scale high, feel tight clothes or look in a mirror, it is like the weight is reminding you, “To like myself, I have to like ALL of myself – not just the good things”

What if the weight was there to help you to stay humble? Maybe there is a prideful element with in you that could get out of control if you were “skinny” so the weight stays on to keep you humble. Dissolve your ego, see where you are overly proud, and the extra weight may not need to stay on your body to keep you humble.

What about the perfectionist side of you? Maybe these few extra pounds are to force you to face and remember that everything doesn’t have to be perfect. Look around you and accept imperfection in the things you have been judging, and the weight will not need to be there to remind you to accept imperfection.

Are you following me? Find the reason for your perceived imperfection until you can find the balance, and love and accept yourself for who you are. You are beautiful, handsome, smart and amazing. Once you see it, the reminders that you hate so much will fade away only to be replaced by love and acceptance.

Alice Inoue

Alice Inoue is the founder and Chief Happiness Officer of Happiness University. She is an expert life guide, and author of five nationally award-winning books on life wisdom, self-growth and happiness. She has two columns, one in MidWeek titled “A Mindful Moment,” and an award-winning column in the Sunday Star-Advertiser called “Go Ask Alice” that offers pertinent life guidance. Through Happiness U, she helps both companies and individuals develop positive mindsets in order to live more inspired in both their professional and private lives.

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